a favor to ask

Hello my followers. I was wondering if i can ask you a favor...
*silence and crick chippings*
Well i ope you are listing ..
I was wondering if you could please follow my new blog which is actually a Book in progress . :)
I uploaded the Prologue and chapter 1 and 2. Its  a2 point perspective .. I would love comments. and followers. Thanks so much
http://addingmorepages.blogspot.com/

~Sweet_but_deadly

On a brighter note

On a brighter note. 

HAPPY THANKSGIVING 

s f  e 

~~Sweet_but_deadly

Moving on....

Moving on from before 

to now. 

This sucks. Because he was never mine to begin with. 

~Sweet_but_deadly. 

When something cuts so deep.

When a person says something to you that cuts deep, slaps you in the face, and pull out your breath...

But you have to smile and nod and act like it doesn't hurt. 

I liked this guy, I’m sure you all know but he likes someone else, my friend. So i have to put it behind be and be there for her and wish her the best for them.

It feels so right when he's with me but he talks about her and asks me questions about her... 

I know when he is going to ask her. I almost had enough time if i wanted to ruin it. But what kind of person would I be? A terrible person. 

There has to be someone out there to like me, right?

~Sweet_But_deadly 

Like you

Every bit of hope i had just flew out of my hands

Every bit of hope that held, about you, about me and Us is gone now. It flew away. I guess if i love something i should let it go but... i don't think you'll be returning to me again.
It's sad. I really felt like there was something between us.
But i found out. You like her, my good friend. Its a bit of a surprise but ok. I need to be happy for you, and her. I need to stay strong.
But i may cry a bit at night.
~Sweet_but_deadly

single

I look around and see happy couples around me
and then there's me
Sad, and single.

hmmm. O well.
I have my girlfriends... :)

~Sweet_but_deadly

follow me 2?

short post- some of you i don't think has followed me on my other blog. ..
http://curiousteendream.blogspot.com/

Um, it's all about my life, school, drama, gossip, pictures, random thoughts. I think its good and kinda cute and I would love it if you followed me!
Thanks so much~

I love you, my followers!!!!

WOW. Followers( update)

WOW. This is all i can say, WOW! I have gained at least 3 extra followers! I'm so excited. Because of this, i'm going to try to blog more.
 ( i couldn't because... 1. blogger won't load.. 2. too much hw, little time. 3. lazy!)
So, i'm gonna catch you newbies in my life, and sum up how my little "crush" love thing is going on.
so, um, where to begin. Well.. There's this one guy, who this blog first started about. He is very cute, nice, funny, smart, speaks his mind ... and so amazing. So, I started blogging about him when the school year started because i though I was over him a bit over the summer, but when i saw him again my heart leaped. Anywho- we've been talking a lot, flirting, hanging out and everything is going great.. till that little pain hurts you when you think that "he" likes someone else. So i was a bit down for a few weeks but my friends took me to ou schools "festival/party" to get me back up.... you want to know what happened.... I RAN IN TO MY EX!?!
You see... (flashback) I had this one guy, very amazing person, who was my first boyfriend. we lasted for about a year, and maybe 3/4. And then he had to leave schools, tried to make it work, failed, broke up, sad,.... and then over him. And i really was over him, but when i turned around and ran into him...
All the memories came back, and he had gotten a lot cutter! And, so we hung out some more. ( just as friends) but it felt like more. He then invited me and his friend to go to his schools Football game ( my first one) and it was awesome. He made me laugh so much and it was good to be with him, the only thing was,he wasn't mine.
:( ...
so people at his school kept asking who he was taking to Homecoming, and he was single and he said " didn't know" and blah - blah.. cut tot he chase. SO, this one girl says that he should take her friend, gave him her number and next thing u know, pictures are up with him and her and he is in a relationship! ( turns out he almost wanted to ask me but thought it odd since we go to different schools. )
so- for a while i can't get him out of my head, and that interferes with me and my crush .. .
so i really don't know what to do.
should i just stop- no boys for a while - or keep waiting for one of them....
please PLZ! leave a comment and tell me what you think. Thanks so much!

- its scary cuz the dance is coming up and idk wat to do!


~Sweet_But_deadly

ps. hope this post makes up for me not blogging in a while... :)

The Dance

The Fall Dance is coming around the corner. :)
Sorry I've been so busy, school, homework, drama, life, not enough sleep and i got a little cold! *sniff*
But, i'm ok now. :)
so -- in to my secret crush....


~~~~~~~~~

We were all sitting at our round table during lunch, talking about homework and classes and how are weekend went and then... someone asked- " who's going to the dance?"
For a few silent seconds, eyes darted from person to person and no one spoke a word, untill one girl said "yea, i' am ... " And then many more chirped up saying yes or no or even maybe's. You then looked at me and asked, if  I  am going. You stared at me for a few seconds, i almost thought you might ask.. but you didn't but it was close enough so i just said, " yea, maybe, i think i will..."  A small smile spread across your lips and lunch ended and we went to class.


~~
I can't wait for the dance!!!!


~Sweet_but_deadly

procrastination

Yea, i'm sorry sweet followers... but.. i tend to be avoiding the subject of me and my mystery boy...
long story but i promise my next post will be all about him and... (duh, duh, duh) my Ex-boyfriend coming in the picture. :) The plot thickens.
But I can't do that till i ask a big favor of you guys. To check out an amazing blog by my friend, BlueBerryPie. She is just starting out this blogging thing and she is amazing. She needs some.. motivation so if you would please follow her then that would be great!
And i'm not making another post till one of u people follow her!! jk. If you don't that's ok, its up to you.. but a bit mean.. but i understand. Just please give it a try. Thanks!
http://cupcakesandchaoshigh.blogspot.com/

And I will add more on my next post about Mystery Boy and Ex. Thanks!!!
~sweet_But_deadly

Just using pictures to help describe how i feel :) .. :( .. :) 

~Sweet_ButDeadly

memories with you again

I never have smiled so big in such a long time. I always dreamed about what would happen if i were to run into you again... How i would act, how i would run into your arms and give you a Hug. You would then scope me up and Cary me around and we would catch up our lives. But that's not what happened.
I saw you, by surprise. I was busy talking and doing stuff in my own world when all of a sudden i hear "turn around.." And so i do. And i turn around right into you. my face goes blank, my mind is prossing so many things. You chuckle a warm lovely  laugh and smile at my expressions i make. The only thing is say is " you, you've gotten taller.." Which you have, like you were towering over me. You always were taller then me but this was too tall! You cut your long wavy hair to a short messy cut. It was cute. in fact you were handsome, and amazing! I still wasn't talking much because i didn't know what to say. Your eyes just danced when they met mine and you kept grinning. Finally my friend steps in and says "Whats new with you?" And then i remember, you were at my school. You had left this school, what were you doing at his party/festival?
You say you came with your friend who goes here and you stopped to say hi. I wanted to run up and hug you like in my mind, but i stood still. I asked how was your school and we chatted some more. My friend had to leave so me and my friends walked her out.  I left you with  your "bro" and i started to talk about you to my friends. They were all excited and shocked just as me, but i was more shocked. It felt so good to see you, i kept thinking about you all day. Most of my friends left, but i had one good  girlfriend with me and we found you again. We talked more and caught up with each others lives. I can't get your face out of my head.
 I went to sleep that night, thinking about you and then i started wondering on the "What ifs"
what if you never left - would we still be existing? What if we were still a couple? Would we still be happy and hugging during class break? I think back and i think that we could have lasted, i think that its because of  the long distance. But were still in the place, but different schools... :(
It was so good to see you. your humor hasn't changed and you made me laugh again. That was my favorite trate from you. You can make me laugh,and you were kind, and understanding and just... Amazing.
I wish there wasn't a big X on ex boyfriend.  We could have lasted. I bet. I miss you. I thought i was over it but  all the memories came back .

I'm gonna stop because i might cry. I wish i could see you in the hallways and i remember how i would dress up just to see if you noticed. I remember, you were the first guy who called me beautiful. The only guy who said that. I will never forget.

~Sweet_But_Deadly

mixed signals

Mixed signals

-          Ok now I’m just getting mixed signals from you and I can’t think straight. My mind is going everywhere…. It really sucks because now I’m a bit down because the signal I get is that you like her and I thought we had something but I guess we don’t and now .. It just hurts – and I wrong or am I right?

-          Sorry for such a short terrible, sad, pitiful, not love crush cute post. Just sad and broken hearted L

~Sweet_But_Deadly

So many followers

I just want to say that you guys make me so happy!!!
I love getting new followers and i love getting feddback, coments - negitive or happy. :) But i prefer happy ones!

It makes my day to see a new follower or a new comment on my post, to know that someone cares and is out there reading about my little life and finding something interesting about it. :)
SO just a giant hug for you all !!! and lets eat cake and drink coffee/hotcoco together!!
thanks so much!

~Sweet_But_Deadly

what A Sec...Do you like HER

Now, just let me take a second look, Do you like her? I mean, yea she is funny, and nice, and can create a great convo but i feel like i was just dropped down from the clouds. I'm falling down and down..I bullet just hit me through my chest and i'm bleeding everywhere. Now that I think about it, you are always hanging around her.. always talking with her. SHE even knows when you have a next game! I mean really, I should know that... wait.. why don't i know that... it's because you never told me. Why didn't you tell me?
OK, calm down I maybe looking at this too much. I may not know the whole story... maybe she is just a friend... but what if i'm just a friends. Is there someone else. I'M FREAKING OUT.
Now i'm sad. and i have just fallen rock bottom. I may just avoid you this hole day with out getting a feeling of the air being  punched right out of me. ... ;(

~Sweet_But_Deadly who is sad. 

It's still too scary

I just want to say that i really appreciate your comment. I would love to do just get it over with and find the answer, but it's still too scary. For me..    We just keep flirting with each other, we hang around each other, and we talk all the time.. but i'm kinda just waiting for him to make the move... is that even right??? I don't know what to think anymore. I just wish it was easy... sorry for another short, sad pitiful post but it makes me happy that you are here listening to me rant and cry and that you comment because that makes my day. :)
thanks
~Sweet_But_Deadly

amazing night. Cont.

Amazing Night continued.

~ The lights were bright, and the reflection of the lights made your eyes dance. We shared eachothers music, thorugh ear buds, and since they can’t stretch very far it made me sit closer to you so it could reach. I saw you nudge your chair closer to me. And then we both watched the computer screen, reading the lyrics to the music you showed me. You have a different taste in music but that’s fine with me, and I’m willing to listen to that for you. It felt like we were alone, but the crazy laughter brought us back to reality. My friends, all around the table were cracking up and telling school stories. We all were in the giant library hanging out after school. Our parents wouldn’t arrive till hours later. It was getting darker out and that’s when out little “party” started. You seemed ok with my friends, but you mostly listened to your music but sometimes you would poke me to get my attention and tell me to listen to this one song or hear this one joke. And of course I did. But I had so much fun, just us in the library hanging out and playing music on our computers. I wish we could have turned off the lights but we didn’t know where the switch was. We got you talking some more and you told us about your pet, which has a very cute name. Soon the party  came to an end and most of my friends left, I hugged them good bye and said I would see them later at school.  By then, it was just you and me, at this huge table listening to music. It was a bit of awkward silence between us but then some chit chat came… and then you had to go. I was the last to leave but I left with a smile on my face. J

~ Sweet_but_Deadly

Ps. I hope this was enough details for you! It ws only in the library at school but no one was there and it was awesome. Thanks

Pps. I really should have just shown him this pic so that way i could just get it over with, and not have to keep thinking if he likes me back... but it's too scary to do...

  

Amazing Night

That night was amazing! We had so much time, we mad each other laugh so much and we traded secrets. It was like a party with just you and be, but with my best friends. They might have noticed the spark between us, because i sure felt some electricity. :) 

We listened to music, told jokes and ran around like 5 year old. It was amazing, every time i looked at you our eyes met and i saw them sparkle with happiness. I went home and played the scene in my head, but at the end... You asked me... and of course i said yes. But that never happened. My feelings for you are clear, but are your feelings clear too?

~Sweet_But_Deadly

Note 2 Self

 Dear self,

Don’t mess this up!

why? What could i mess up?

hmm... let me count the ways

1) Laugh like a weirdo

2) Scream loudly

3) Go sniffing his hair when you think he is not noticing

4) Run across the room when you have 5 minutes of break left just so you can say "Hi"

5) Just smile and get lost in his eye and then he realizes your staring...

6) Say there is someone in this room that you would love to date... and stare right at him

But, i haven’t done all these things! 

- yes- but you may... so it is just a note to self. 

Dear Future BF

Dear Future Boyfriend of mine,
We would run out and  laugh in the rain and when Ii get cold you would offer me your jacket that smells just like you; the sent of honeydew. You would come up behind me and give me a hug and keep me warm.  My mascara would smudge because of the rain but you wouldn't mind and you would push back my soaking wet hair out of my face and we would walk along with fingers inter winded with one another. And when i look at you i realize nothing else matters but you. The next day we would go to a cafe and talk and talk and laugh. I would have attacked the ice-cream desert i ordered and then feel like a fatty even though i am far from it. But you would smile and feel grateful for a girl that eats. Then we would just have the time of our life and be so happy with each other!

~Sweet_but_Deadly

we never have enough time

we had a convo

We had a convo, a very long one to be exact and it was nice.  I got to learn something's about you, and you even learnt some interesting things about me. I pretty sure you were interested, and i know that i was definitely interested in you  and all about you. You’re so nice, and you voice your thoughts. I think i even caught you calling me "cute" in a little "hidden message" you gave me. It made me think about you all day and i thought about that hidden message, i wanted to question you about it but soon the day was over and i went to sleep still thinking about it. 

You called me cute, at least i think you did. I still think about it..... 

J

  ~Sweet_But_Deadly

love music lyrics

sometimes, I wish you'd pay
more attention to my favorite
songs because the lyrics sing
words i'm too scared to say

- Unknown

Laughing love

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"The spaces between your fingers were created so that another's could fill them in." 

- Unknown

We passed each other in the hallway about 6 times and every time we made eye contact. I smiled at you and went on to my classes but I kept getting you in my mind. Finally I got to see you in my class and I found where you were sitting. I sat close, but not to close. You got up to get a book and when you came back you had the book, in which I told you we don’t need it for class just a notebook. You smiled sheepishly thinking “ wow” and I smiled at your cute mistake. Class started and we each said something funny and each time we looked at each other. I hope this means something. J  

a game with you and me

Today I saw you laughing. It made me smile, so i walked over to you and asked you what’s up. You mumbled something and I only heard you “ …funny TV show.” I still smiled and laughed along with you. But then we had to go our own ways. (Stupid school) But I got to meet back with you. It was game party time since we were doing a fun –lock-in. I remember playing the game even though I was playing against you and 3 other players. I secretly watched which card you played so I could choose it ad help you win. J <3 But the day slowly turned grey and we had to go, but there’s Always Monday! 

I saw you Today

I saw you today, In what feels like forever. I blushed and kept my eyes to the ground while we walked past each other. I saw you look at me and I’m sure i saw a blush. I thought that i might not have "the crush" feelings for you, but when i saw you again it came back. I wondered all day if you still had the same. And just my luck, you were in my class. I wanted to sit next to you and catch up but i sat in the corner. But tomorrow I get to see you again.